Here’s an overview of what happens on our Live Course. It’s also a good starting point for your digital learning.

Pathways is a warm up game, designed to help you understand more about your What, Why and How.

• What you’re thinking as you prepare your content and go into performance.
• Your motivation to communicate, Why you want to tell this story at this point in time.
• And all of this informs How you…perform, how you communicate in front of others, in front of an audience or a camera lens, even on a one-to-one basis.

When we run our Live physical course - that’s a group of humans, in a room, all together, you may have done it - it’s noticeable how different people behave when we give them this simple request….

Please could you all stand in a circle and get ready to talk to each other

Things start happening.

We see confident strides. Nervous smiles. Wide eyed stares.

It’s clear that something is happening to the energy of the people in the room.

When you ask people to go one further and speak to each other, this energy changes again. For example…

Please say something now…your name…and how you’re feeling about speaking in front of other people

Smiles change. Wide eyed stares get…more starey!

Things take an even more interesting turn when you ask people to remember something about somebody else in the group…their name, for example…and speak that out loud, whilst moving across the room…the pressure rises exponentially.

Why does this happen? After all, these are simple things that we do in every day life;

• Speaking
• Moving
• Remembering Stuff

But once we’re asked to do this as some kind of performance…well. Let’s take a look at it, so we can help you

Force | Fidget | Freeze

I’m simplifying things for the learning but we could say that people fall into three categories…

People who Force it - it’s almost like they suddenly take on a persona that’s not quite them. “Right…yes, what is it we’re doing? Don’t worry, I know” Their confident stride may hide the fact that they’re not as in control as they seem.

Then there are people who Fidget - i’ve had quite a few Team Leaders fall into this category - at work they are normally assured and in control…now that they’re standing in a circle with other people, they are grinning like they’re back in school and this is all just sooooo embarrassing. One of my students spent the whole Pathways warm up game fidgeting, grinning and hugging themselves to cope with their uncomfortable feelings. They never got back from this opening “mode” and I believe they got a lot less from the course as a result.

Finally, there are people who Freeze - they can’t remember what they have to say or do. They are clearly not enjoying the experience.

I believe it’s common knowledge now that this response is called fight, flight or freeze. Did you know about that last one? Freeze? I learned it from studying the Chimp Paradox, written by Dr Steve Peters - a brilliant book…and he’s written a good few more too.

Just like the brain, this response to “having to perform” is definitely a very complicated thing….but we’ve put it into three different types to help you understand where your head can be at when you’re asked to “perform” in any way - that might be in front of a big audience or, as in Pathways when you attend our course, a small group of people. It may be a live podcast broadcast to thousands, or a short video giving a key message to your team…you may even be publishing this bit on LinkedIn or Insta!

3 simplified responses. Force. Fidget. Freeze

Force I’ll show this audience just who’s boss

I feel so uncomfortable being here, I don’t know what to do about it Fidget

I don’t deserve to be here. This will soon be over Freeze

I’ll show this audience just who’s boss This is where you see performance as a battle, a fight, an antagonistic relationship between you and the other people in the room…you may force your whole persona on to an audience, push it too far and lose them. In one of the worst outcomes, you may end up hating your audience - more on that story later.

When we play Pathways, people who fit this description will tend to…hide their natural self…overdo it just a little bit…put on an act, or over amplify a favoured part of their persona, in order to cope with the stress of standing up and speaking in front of an audience.

I feel so uncomfortable being here, I don’t know what to do about it

I’ve described this “performance type” as somebody who cannot find a natural position of rest - it’s as if they’re struggling with the thought of what’s expected of them. They can’t access any of their natural confidence. They behave like a different person to the one we see every day at work.

I don’t deserve to be here. This will soon be over

When people volunteer in a group situation - as they get up out of their seat they’ll say

I may as well get this over with now

I will often ask them to sit down again and go when they’re ready.

Just as Fight Flight Freeze comes from a prehistoric time when we thought we were gonna be eaten by a sabre tooth tiger at any moment, so Force | Fidget | Freeze comes from a distant past where we absolutely hated performing…

🧑‍🏫 Perhaps because a teacher said something insensitive thing to us when we stood in front of class.

🗣️ Or a parent told us our voice was monotone - I am always shocked to hear this…and i’ve heard it far too many times for my liking.

💡Or perhaps you never got the chance because other people stole the limelight.

People like me.

I loved getting up and performing as a child. My family encouraged it.

They still do.

I’ve studied and worked on performance ever since…and now I have the added benefit of being able to record and produce my own work on this wonderful equipment.

And I want to help you.

For now, before you go on to the next chapter.

Consider your awareness of those 3 responses.

I’ll show this audience just who’s boss Force

I feel so uncomfortable being here, I don’t know what to do about it Fidget

I don’t deserve to be here. This will soon be over Freeze

Be ready to spot those negative, unbalancing feelings before, during and after your performance and know that you can deal with them.

Remember… What you’ve got to do

Why it’s important and then…

How you do it…

….will become second nature the more you work at it.

Welcome to this course.

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At the time of writing…

I discovered that there is a fourth trauma response. Fawn